Dear Negative Ego re: [parenting]

We went for a Parents-Teacher Meeting and we were discussing some of the little projects the children were doing at school. And one of them was a cooking project. The teacher told me that the kids made fried rice with salmon and they had a good time. And she said in a laughing manner, "And I'm sorry, I know Sasha is a vegetarian but I gave her some salmon to try...." laughter.

You wanted me to jump in and make a fuss about it, but I simply breathe it out and said, "Did she like it?"

When we left the meeting, I was thinking and weighing the options of what is best for our daughter. The method of education is what we like in this day care as it has an emphasis on self expression, creativity, life skills and so on.

However, you negative ego wanted me to feel that our vegetarian lifestyle was unsupported by the school. I made it clear to you negative ego, that this is to be expected in a world of largely meat eaters where there is still a lack of education of health, sustainable living and the practice of compassion towards other living creatures. I am just going to continue to educate our daughter in the best way I know how and at the same time acknowledge that I cannot shelter her from the world forever. I will do my best and trust in my own abilities to raise my child with our spiritual/moral/ethical values in this world we live in.

Dear Negative ego re: [illusion of lack of time and the illusion of death]

I was planning to use this time before Christmas to catch up on paper work and emails, but grandma passed on yesterday. You tried to instill energies of stress by saying there's no time to do anything! When am I ever going to have time? I breathed your words out....

And listened to my own still voice within and know that this is just a glitch in time. With proper planning, all will work out well. Some things will have to wait as well. So here I am writing this blog and after which I will spend 15 minutes planning my time for the next few days and also to fulfill my commitment to my 4 year old that Christmas will be wonderful despite all that is going on.

So negative ego I know this is your big chance to jump into everything that is happening. But I promise you that I will be extra vigilant!

Dear Negative ego re: [judgment]

Today my sister told me that our grandmother is dying. And I said, "she has been dying for the past 2-3 years".

As I said these words in a matter of fact way, you tried to instill guilt in me that I was being cold or lacking in compassion. The truth is my grandmother is in her 90s and in and out of hospital countless times and the doctor has called for the family to be at her bedside telling us to prepare for her death and this has been done at least 3 times already in the past 2 years. This of course has allowed the family to be very prepared for her transition but grandma remains strong and alive.

I observe that yes, the doctors have given us many false alarms, which is a blessing for the family to prepare but I am not going to allow you, negative ego to instill guilt in me because I am ready for grandma's transition. I am aware that it is a matter of time and I also know that there is no such thing as 'death'.

So negative ego, I know you will try to instill feelings/thoughts that are common in mass consciousness but I am not going to get involved with those lower thoughtforms. I choose to align with the higher understanding of transition and the concept of 'death'.

Dear Negative ego re: [illusion]

As things are getting busy as I am leaving for Hong Kong tomorrow, you have been trying to jump in to start your own party. I am not going to give in to you. You introduced energy sapping thoughts such as, there is too much to do, there's not enough time, or it is too tiring. These are sliding off my golden bubble of protection. I want you to know that I already have my schedule in place, so don't try to sway me into your patterns. I am not going to let you pull me off centre.

I am happy to say that I am full of energy and I am on target with what I want to achieve today and even have time to spend with my family and to complete my chores.

Dear Negative ego re: [patience]

This must be a season of giving as well as repetitions :-)

I was at the supermarket but I didn't bring my shopping bag as it was an unplanned trip to buy some grocery. I went to the cashier and told her to put everything in one plastic bag. She looked at me as if she understood but proceeded to put my things into two bags, so I repeated my request politely again thinking she didn't hear me the first time. She looked at me again, and then continued to put the things into two bags! At this time, negative ego, you were all ready to pounce in. But I remained centred and refused to engage with you in any way. And I looked and smiled at the cashier and said one more time, please put everything in one bag, gesturing 'one bag' at the same time. Then she finally understood me!

You, negative ego again tried to jump in by saying judgmentally, if she didn't understand why didn't she ask! I brushed you off not wanting to give you any more energy than you deserve.

This may be a season of giving, but I am not giving my power away to you negative ego!

Dear Negative ego re: [vigilance]

A friend offered a service which I needed, I agreed to the terms including the fee knowing that he will not be able to deliver his service in integrity, as this has been a pattern of his from the past. Knowing what I know but because I needed the service (and in my mind decided that this was going to be the last time I use his services), I agreed. But I could see you slowly creeping in.

So the day came and true enough, at the last moment, the service was not up to par which caused some inconvenience to me. But I was prepared for it. In anticipation of what might happen, I created a battleplan before hand on how to handle this. I gave him a chance to right it, but he didn't take it. So remaining centred I did what I had to do. Negative ego, you tried to pull me into judgment of him, as well as self blame. But I told you, I am already prepared for this so don't even try to pull me off centre.

I am glad all turned out well for me in the end. And that I took responsibility for what I created for myself.

Dear Negative Ego re: [parenting]

I was reading to my young daughter her bed time story last night and you tried hard to get in into your act. My daughter was asking me a question and I answered her patiently, three seconds later, she asked me the same question and I repeated my answer. Five seconds later she asked the same question again. I could see you coming in and wanting me to get into your act. So I breathed in deeply and answered her again. Then she went on to ask me the same question two more times. I let it pass and said, I'm going to continue reading the book and you can ask me your question later. We finished the book and my young daughter forgot about her question.

This incident reminded me of a video I saw (see below) on youtube. Negative ego, I can see how you would love to jump in and introduce your negative thoughts and feelings. But I am not going to play your game. Be gone.

Dear Negative ego re: [indecision]

While booking for my air ticket for my upcoming trip to HK, you tried to put me in two minds. Because the prices of air tickets have gone up considerably on my preferred dates of travel, you say it is ok to not to make a decision yet, while in the background trying to introduce all kinds of negative thoughts about the travel arrangements.

I observe that you were trying to introduce fuzziness in my mind and to also engage my emotional body in a negative sense. Logically speaking with such a short time span left, there is no chance the prices are coming down, for they will be going up. So I took a deep breath, spent 2 mins to clear my mind and made a decision. I learned from Dr Stone that making a 'bad' decision is better than not making a decision at all and I am glad I didn't flow your train of fuzzy thoughts.

I am happy that all the arrangements have been made, and I am also taking a day off while in HK since I didn't get the preferred date to come home. So I will make use of my day off with some sightseeing and a little half day retreat by myself. Thanks but no thanks to you negative ego.

Dear Negative ego re: [illusion]

I had an email discussion with a friend and student and we talked about how convoluted your work can be. We see through your illusion. When you surface within a person's mind, you thrive in allowing the person to firstly over identify with your thoughts and then you instigate a fight between one of your thoughtforms with another one of your thoughtforms! So it is in truth, you fighting with another aspect of you, just so you can stay alive in a person's consciousness.

My friend and I saw through this and we thought how funny this is!

Negative ego, we just want you to know that we will laugh you off the stage if this is the last thing we do!

Dear Negative ego re: [little irritants]

You've been trying pull me off centre the past few mornings. I am happy to say by today, your voice has almost diminished with regards to the situation with my dog. I am not going to give you power in this, so you might as well stay away.

My 13 year old beagle, Trix who is deaf and almost blind has picked up this habit of barking now every morning at 5am. Beagles with sharp noses can smell anything a mile away. So Trix knows when I am awake even though she is confined at the back kitchen for her own safety (but she can smell me!) and she is insistent that taking her for her walk should be the first thing I do now instead of waiting for 6 or 6.30am, which means my morning routine is also now thrown off. So she barks to get my attention and she knows that I will go to her because I don't want to wake the entire neighourhood up with her incessant baying. Her barking tends to echo through the whole condo estate!

Anyway, negative ego, your efforts to introduce irritation and anxiety towards the dog is not working. I spotted it on the first day they surfaced. But I chose not to energise them, but made the conscious effort instead to remain even and calm. Changing my morning routine is no big deal, it is working out fine with me and Trix. So negative ego, stay away!