I was planning to use this time before Christmas to catch up on paper work and emails, but grandma passed on yesterday. You tried to instill energies of stress by saying there's no time to do anything! When am I ever going to have time? I breathed your words out....
And listened to my own still voice within and know that this is just a glitch in time. With proper planning, all will work out well. Some things will have to wait as well. So here I am writing this blog and after which I will spend 15 minutes planning my time for the next few days and also to fulfill my commitment to my 4 year old that Christmas will be wonderful despite all that is going on.
So negative ego I know this is your big chance to jump into everything that is happening. But I promise you that I will be extra vigilant!
Showing posts with label death. Show all posts
Showing posts with label death. Show all posts
Monday, 21 December 2009
Wednesday, 16 December 2009
Dear Negative ego re: [judgment]
Today my sister told me that our grandmother is dying. And I said, "she has been dying for the past 2-3 years".
As I said these words in a matter of fact way, you tried to instill guilt in me that I was being cold or lacking in compassion. The truth is my grandmother is in her 90s and in and out of hospital countless times and the doctor has called for the family to be at her bedside telling us to prepare for her death and this has been done at least 3 times already in the past 2 years. This of course has allowed the family to be very prepared for her transition but grandma remains strong and alive.
I observe that yes, the doctors have given us many false alarms, which is a blessing for the family to prepare but I am not going to allow you, negative ego to instill guilt in me because I am ready for grandma's transition. I am aware that it is a matter of time and I also know that there is no such thing as 'death'.
So negative ego, I know you will try to instill feelings/thoughts that are common in mass consciousness but I am not going to get involved with those lower thoughtforms. I choose to align with the higher understanding of transition and the concept of 'death'.
As I said these words in a matter of fact way, you tried to instill guilt in me that I was being cold or lacking in compassion. The truth is my grandmother is in her 90s and in and out of hospital countless times and the doctor has called for the family to be at her bedside telling us to prepare for her death and this has been done at least 3 times already in the past 2 years. This of course has allowed the family to be very prepared for her transition but grandma remains strong and alive.
I observe that yes, the doctors have given us many false alarms, which is a blessing for the family to prepare but I am not going to allow you, negative ego to instill guilt in me because I am ready for grandma's transition. I am aware that it is a matter of time and I also know that there is no such thing as 'death'.
So negative ego, I know you will try to instill feelings/thoughts that are common in mass consciousness but I am not going to get involved with those lower thoughtforms. I choose to align with the higher understanding of transition and the concept of 'death'.
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